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Networking: 3 Ways To Start A Conversation
talessi@ariesfoundation.org
Here Are 3 Ways To Open A Conversation With Anyone
The question we get asked often is "How do I start a conversation at a networking event?" or "how do I start a conversation at a bar?", or maybe "How do I start a conversation at a party?"
We spoke in our last blog post about trying to take the pressure off in going to a networking event and this is another one of those thoughts for trying to take the pressure off. See sometimes we get locked into thinking, by that we mean that we have all these things floating around in our heads, and when the moment comes for us to speak, well there's way too much going on, and we freeze up and you say nothing. I find it much easier if you've got 3 concepts that you can take with you anywhere, so it just becomes reflexive and you actually will speak up and you'll get in the conversation and maybe meet some cool people.
CONVERSATION #1 "GOOGLE BRAIN"
OK so it sounds a little silly, but think about it, where do you go to get your info today? Technology, right? And one of those places is Google. If you want to know how to get from point A to point B, you go to Google. If you want to know what restaurant is really good in your area, juat type it into Google. The point is that we go to our tech. This first tip; is that instead of turning to our cellphone to ask Google or Siri a question, turn to the person that you don't know and ask them instead. This works even better if it is aquestion that you have been thinking about or ruminating over for some time.
Example: Maybe it's your first time to place or the area where the event is being held. You can turn to someone and ask if they know a good (restaurant, bar, coffee shop) in the area. Do they in the area and what's it like? Then we can start really conversing witha back and forth; "How do you like it here? What's your favorite thing?" Wwhen you ask them a feeling question When you get down to how they're feeling, that's when the ping pong starts back and forth and now we're talking about how to keep the conversation going, flowing and interesting rather than how to get it started in the first place so that is why Google Brain can be so effective.
CONVERSATION #2 "TWITTER ME"
Unlike Google where we go to ask questions Twitter is more about making statements, which is great, except that for most of us we are trying to come up with something creative or provactive to say, and most of the time we are back to being stuck with thoughts in our heads instead of words coming out of our mouths. And for most us the difficulty here is "Okay, what do I say?
It shouldn't be an off remark, like "Gee it's hot ourtside", or "this is a neat place". You need to put some feeling into the statement you are making that will help engage someone in talking to you.
"Man, I don't know if I can take anyore of this snow. I am getting tired of all the cold weather"
"Wow, I have never been here before, this place is pretty cool"
If you turn to someone and offer them a statement with someof your feelings in it then they will generally offer a reaction or a follow up statement of there own. And then guess what - you are in a conversation.
CONVERSATION #3 - "GREAT TO SEE YOU"
That said, there is one more thing that you can use and this one is more of a line and it works really well in closed social settings like bars, corporations, like any sort of an area, so bars, corporations, universities, friend groups if you're at a party with someone any sort of thing where these people do kind of have a reason to speak to one another you're expected to be social and this one is you just walk up to someone you say, "Hey, I don't think I've met you yet.
I'm..." say your name and you stick your hand out for a handshake.
Or if you in a corporate or netwrok setting where everyone is wearing a name tag then just try
"Hi (name on tage) its' great to see you" This works wonders because it sub-communicates amazing things. First off, it sub-communicates that people are supposed to be mingling here and maybe we have met before at some point. Second, it sub-communicates that you are a social person since you're starting the conversation. They will follow you, stick your hand out right away and they'll reflexively shake your hand and follow it up with
"What brings you here (today, tonight)?"
That's going to get the conversation going so I don't overthink or make it more complicated than it needs to be. Getting and going to events should be the hardest part, once you're there, relax and enjoy, and have some fun atarting conversationa and making conncetions.
QUESTIONS? ASK US. WE CAN HELP WITH THAT!
Check out the ARIES Foundation for FInancial Education, Inc our blog posts https://www.ariesfoundation.org/blog
to learn more about about how we might be able to help you.
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